Reactive Brain

Mean, nice-? SHINE ON!

Years ago I was teaching the Intensive Learning Community and thought to divide the group into those who were MEAN and those who were NICE. No problem–people knew exactly what I meant, and had strong reactions to those who were in the other group. Since then I’ve wondered about that energetic dichotomy. What is it […]

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What if we’re all doing the best we can?

When was the last time you judged? Yourself, someone else? 5 seconds ago? 5 minutes? Maybe you made it a whole hour without comparing, sizing up, declaring the worth of you or those around you. Judging is part of how we make sense of the world. Our brains are programmed to predict (“what will happen

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CALL TO ACTION– Be an Activist: Choose to Live Above the Line

Are you feeling stressed out about the current political landscape? Want to have a flowing, maybe even an enjoyable experience of the US election? Here’s an invitation: Below is a reprise of a post I wrote in 2017. It will give you the context for what I’m up to. I’m bringing together anyone who commits

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Celebrating the season of darkness

I know the dark calls to you sometimes. That you turn your face from the light. I know you walk down the roads you know you shouldn’t, walk into places your heart is gently urging you not to. –Sarah Blondin, Practicing Gentle Kindness Toward Ourself* So, how are you doing with the darkest time of

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Choose your story wisely

We both stood there astride our bikes, our voices choking with grief. Kath pointed at the green foliage surrounding us and said, “Can you imagine if all of this was on fire?” No, I couldn’t. It’s unimaginable. And yet the Amazon rainforest burns. Here we are again, facing a calamity many miles from us, and

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What Alphas don’t know (yet)

“In many ways the performances of Donald Trump remind me of male chimpanzees and their dominance rituals,” Jane Goodall, the anthropologist, told me shortly before Trump won the GOP nomination. “In order to impress rivals, males seeking to rise in the dominance hierarchy perform spectacular displays: stamping, slapping the ground, dragging branches, throwing rocks. The

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blue dream with white figure

Blessing our human wholeness

It’s the season of Thanksgiving. But are you ready to see the blessing of your human wholeness? Last night, at the Intensive Learning Community (an ongoing group I lead), a participant (I’ll call her Amy) was feeling mixed about celebrating Thanksgiving. “Now that I understand what a myth I’ve been believing [about the Pilgrims and

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ANGER IS ENERGY!

Befriending anger

(Want to know more about healthy anger? Listen to my podcast #11, Anger is Power.)   Knowing what to do with anger is very tricky for us humans. We have a shared understanding that we shouldn’t hurt each other (the Golden Rule and all). But we don’t know what we should do with all of

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S.E.W.-ing your way out of power struggle

Here’s the single skill that will end the most difficult of power dynamics: S.E.W. In my post called “Power Dynamics: We know ’em when when we see ’em,” I described how lapsing into instinctive power differences is what behind every relationship conflict. While the magical experience of falling in love is what draws most couples together, the honeymoon ends when

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