Essence

Mean, nice-? SHINE ON!

Years ago I was teaching the Intensive Learning Community and thought to divide the group into those who were MEAN and those who were NICE. No problem–people knew exactly what I meant, and had strong reactions to those who were in the other group. Since then I’ve wondered about that energetic dichotomy. What is it

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What if we’re all doing the best we can?

When was the last time you judged? Yourself, someone else? 5 seconds ago? 5 minutes? Maybe you made it a whole hour without comparing, sizing up, declaring the worth of you or those around you. Judging is part of how we make sense of the world. Our brains are programmed to predict (“what will happen

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Playing Your Own Game

When I was little, I started out by fighting dirty. In our household (I was the youngest of four in the 1960s) the siblings fought a lot. I’ve since wondered about that culture, where punching, pushing, and brawling was the order of the day, but it definitely prepared me to stand my ground. And, over

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THIS IS WHAT WE’RE HERE FOR

Wild fires. Scorching heat, suffocating smoke. The slow unspooling of the pandemic, with its high mortality rate, long-term physical damage, wide-spread economic and educational ramifications. Racial and class inequities coming to the fore; marchers in the street. An ever-widening political chasm encouraged by our highest leaders. How in the world is any individual supposed to

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Thirty things I learned (about relationships) in thirty years

In July, my spouse Kathy and I celebrated our thirtieth anniversary. To commemorate this wonderful occasion, I did 30 posts on “Thirty Things I Learned (About Relationships) in Thirty Years.” A few of you asked that I put all of them together. So here is my Thanksgiving gift to you all: All thirty in one

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Door #3: Beyond patriarchy into co-creativity

As we’ve collectively whirled through the latest political battle, we stand back and assess the winners and losers. The winners chortle and celebrate their spoils, the losers become embittered and vow to fight harder. It’s been epic, a true drama of victims and villains and heroes going head to head like gladiators in the ring. As

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blue dream with white figure

Blessing our human wholeness

It’s the season of Thanksgiving. But are you ready to see the blessing of your human wholeness? Last night, at the Intensive Learning Community (an ongoing group I lead), a participant (I’ll call her Amy) was feeling mixed about celebrating Thanksgiving. “Now that I understand what a myth I’ve been believing [about the Pilgrims and

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ANGER IS ENERGY!

Befriending anger

(Want to know more about healthy anger? Listen to my podcast #11, Anger is Power.)   Knowing what to do with anger is very tricky for us humans. We have a shared understanding that we shouldn’t hurt each other (the Golden Rule and all). But we don’t know what we should do with all of

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