The Relationship Ride (the baby is almost here)

My brilliant editor and dear friend, Verna Wilder, and I just did the dance of joy in the corridor of the BCCL. Why? Because in our very hands was the proof of my new book, The Relationship Ride: A Usable, Unusual, Transformative Guide. We sat down and savored the beautiful cover (by the initimable artist/designer Eric Boelts), gasped at the wonderful design (co-created by Verna and Eric) and even had time to partake in enjoying the a few words and concepts. This baby is just about born!

Please join us for the celebratory launch and book signing on April 2! (Details below.) To whet your appetite, here’s another excerpt.

“Intimate relationship creates the perfect storm of predicament for most of us. It looks like this: We are drawn to the intimacy of connection because we want to be seen, and being seen is like falling in love with our self. We say things like, “I love who I am when I am with her” or “He brings out the best part of me.” To truly experience the bliss of intimacy, we believe we must blur our edges and allow ourselves to fuse with our partner into the poetic epitome of love: two souls become one. This can feel wonderful, similar to the intense spiritual experience of blending into the cosmos. It is tempting to try to stay in that place of oceanic expansion. But because there are two separate people, we cannot maintain that blurred state. The drop must pull itself out of the sea to once again create its own identity.

This transition between intense intimacy and separation is a rocking motion between the need to give up self in order to have connection and then, after the intensity of merging, having to give up connection to regain a sense of self. With awareness, this movement can feel harmonious. However, the merging of selves can bring up fears of engulfment, while traveling out into separateness can trigger past issues of abandonment, turning the smooth rhythm into jarring dissonance.”

—The Relationship Ride (Introduction, The Ship of Dreams)

Come celebrate the launch of The Relationship Ride: A Usable, Unusual, Transformative Guide. Saturday, April 2, 7:00pm, The Boulder Center for Conscious Living, 1637 28th St (west of Q’doba). Book reading/signing, champagne and noshes, sea shanties and jigs, and free sailor hats to the first 50 people!