Are you in balance with giving and receiving?

Here we are in the middle of the holiday season, when the to-do list can seem endless, and energy hard to come by.

As you decide how you want to participate in the variety of possible events, you might want to take a moment to inventory where you are with your own energy. Here’s an inventory I put together so you can see where you are with being balanced about giving and receiving.


 GIVING: (Giving beyond what you want to give OR being afraid to give anything for fear that you’ll be expected to keep giving)

  1. Health issues (acute and chronic)
  2. Being out of your body
  3. Resentment
  4. Exhaustion
  5. Using drifts
  6. You pride yourself on being selfless and particularly giving
  7. You perceive others to be:
    1. Needy
    2. Ungrateful
    3. Weak, helpless
    4. Victims
    5. Others give you feedback that you are being a hero, controlling, overwhelming them, or a martyr OR that you’re emotionally disconnected

RECEIVING: (Not being open to receiving what is offered OR Not asking for what you REALLY want)

  1. Health issues (acute and chronic)
  2. Being out of your body
  3. Doing things you don’t want to do
  4. Disappointment
  5. Exhaustion
  6. Using drifts
  7. You perceive others to be:
    1. Ungenerous
    2. Having a hidden agenda
    3. Controlling
    4. Requiring something in exchange
    5. Intrusive
    6. Others give you feedback that you are “too needy” OR that you aren’t willing to receive

How do you get back into balance? Here are some ideas:

  1. Try only doing what you want to do, and not doing what you don’t want to do. People around you will actually appreciate you being clear. This sounds like, “Actually, I want to stay home while you all go out.”
  2. Let yourself know when you need to regenerate. Take time to quiet down, notice what it is you really need.
  3. Get present. Breathe, move, go internal so you can notice your own cues that you might have been ignoring.
  4. Give what you want to give.
  5. Receive what you want to receive.
  6. Observe your judgments of others. See the as the projections they are, and get beneath them to what you’re feeling (mad/sad/glad/scared/sexual?)

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